Road to Rhode Island: Intoxicated
by namelesslunitic
Summary: Multiverse Series: On the road to Rhode Island, Stewie ends up stranded in a rundown motel with a blackout drunk Brian, leaving him with no other choice but to take control of the situation...in more ways than one. (Cover Art by Rianko)


**Author's Note: A few years ago, I put up a poll inquiring as to which episodes my readers would like to see interpreted into a story for my Multiverse Series. The results did not surprise me. Long story short, this is a long overdue fic. When I had originally put up that poll, I had been on a roll and writing Brewie fic all the time. I really did think that I would be able to respond to that poll without any trouble. And, well, things happened. I got swept up in this crazy thing called life. I know that's a trite excuse, but it is a true one. I've been going through a huge transition over these past few years, but I assure you that my passion for this pairing has never waned. So, here I am posting up a fic, addressing a poll that very few people, if any, probably still care about. I simply don't like to leave things unfinished or readers disappointed. So, hopefully, this story was worth the wait. I'm certainly quite fond of it. Road to Rhode Island is a very special episode to me, my absolute favorite, so it was a pleasure to finally get to tackle this. It was also just nice to write something new again, and I'm hoping that I can start getting fics up more often now that I'm in a much more stable place in my life. I'm going to try and be more active in the Brewie community in general, too. There will be details regarding that on my profile page, though. As for here, I have nothing left to say except that I hope whoever reads this enjoys it. Grab some popcorn. It's a long one.**

 **Warning: This story contains pedophilia, bestiality, and non-consensual sexual situations.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own _Family Guy_ or any of these characters.**

 **Multiverse Series**

 **Road to Rhode Island: Intoxicated**

"That was my plan. Where's yours?"

Stewie sat there on the floor, arms folded defiantly, as he stared up at the pathetic, intoxicated mutt who had been given the great, undeserved honor of escorting him back to his sad little home.

It was supposed to be a simple task, but despite this, the drunken dog standing shitfaced before him had somehow managed to land them in quite the predicament. Their flight home was boarding right at this very moment, and their tickets were long gone, as was their luggage. Sure, Stewie knew he'd been the last person in possession of their bags, but it was this dumb dog's fault for wandering off and drinking himself into a stupor. If the canine had shown even a modicum of self-control, Stewie never would have had to go looking for him, never would have left their bags alone with Rupert (who honestly needed to show a little self-control himself when it came to his wandering eyes). So, yes, Stewie knew that he could easily put all the blame on this idiotic animal.

So, he sat there, waiting for a response. Brian just continued to stare at him stone-faced before finally muttering out said response.

"I-I got nothin'."

The infant sighed and rolled his eyes. He stood up from his spot and brushed some imaginary dust from his shoulder.

"Well, this is all your fault, so I suggest that you think of somethin' soon. I'm not wasting anymore effort on this problem. It's your screw-up. Fix it."

Stewie walked over and retrieved Rupert from a seat in the waiting area before returning to find the dog trying to explain their situation to the female attendant at the boarding gate.

"S-So, you-you see that's what happened, but we still really n-need to get on this flight. His mother is expecting him, and I don-don't want to worry her. Could you pl-please just let us on?"

The woman just shook her head and frowned at the mutt.

"I'm afraid there's nothing I can do to help you. It was your responsibility to hold on to your tickets."

She looked over and noticed Stewie standing behind Brian. A twinge of sympathy washed over her expression. She spoke again, this time with a tone that was all too sweet and, in Stewie's opinion, highly insulting.

"I'm sorry, little guy. I bet you're eager to get back to your mommy, huh?"

The child scoffed at the absurd notion, muttering a reply under his breath.

"Only in the sense that I'm eager to get back to my plans to end that wretched wench."

Brian turned and shot the child a dirty look.

Stewie shot the dog a look right back.

The airport attendant cleared her throat to get the pair's attention.

"Ahem. So, I guess you'll be staying in Palm Springs for the night?"

Brian's stern expression fell. He hung his head, looking defeated before finally turning back to address the woman.

"Y-Yeah. That would seem to be the case."

The woman nodded.

"Well, if you would like, I could probably find you a phonebook or something so you can at least locate a hotel. Your young travel companion there should at least sleep in a bed tonight."

She smiled at the baby and used that sickeningly sweet tone again.

"We'll make sure you're taken care of, sweetie. You'll be back with Mommy in no time!"

Stewie could feel his anger rising. Oh, how he despised being talked down to in such a manner. The only solace he took in the matter was the knowledge that he had yet another person to add to his list of enemies to punish severely once he ruled the world.

The woman didn't wait for a response from either the infant or the dog. Without another word, she walked off to retrieve the pair a phonebook that could assist them.

Brian sighed and walked back over to the seats. He hopped up on one and leaned back with a groan, rubbing his temples as he whispered.

"Oh, god. Lois is going to kill me…"

Stewie was still incredibly miffed at this whole ridiculous situation. He saw no reason to spare this mutt any sympathy. Instead, he simply rolled his eyes and took a seat in the row across from Brian, Rupert still in tow.

"Yes, you are probably right."

The child smirked smugly, finding pleasure in the idea of Brian losing favor with his insupportable hag of a mother. He chuckled to himself.

"I'd say it was nice knowing you, but…"

Another gleeful laugh escaped him as he let the sentence hang in the air, knowing it would have the exact effect he sought to inflict on the dog.

Brian scowled at him, obviously trying to seem intimidating but failing miserably when he was simply unable to mask the very apparent fear and worry present in his expression.

Stewie just held his smile, and before long, the dog's mask cracked completely as his lips fell into a frown.

The canine sat up and huffed through his nostrils.  
"Forget this."

He hopped off of the seat and turned to walk away.

"I'm heading back to the bar."

At this, the boy's eyes went wide.

 _Back to the bar? How bloody irresponsible are you?!_

It really shouldn't be surprising at this point, but little Stewie still found himself having a very negative reaction to the thought of this dumb dog leaving him alone at the gate _again_. The infant felt his hands balling into fists. He slammed them down on the seat hard and shouted after the useless cur.

"Oh! Well, that's just bloody brilliant! I'm sure you'll find all the answers to your problems at the bottom of a glass!"

Brian didn't even spare him another glance let alone a response, and this only served to frustrate Stewie more. He clenched his teeth and seethed.

 _Pathetic, useless creature._

The boy leaned back in his seat, clutching his bear tightly as he waited for the attendant to return.

"Who the hell does he think he is?"

The question was only halfway directed at Rupert. It didn't matter, though, as the bear didn't offer up any response. Stewie just figured his companion was trying to lay low for the moment, probably ashamed of himself for having been so careless with the luggage before.

The infant sighed and turned his bear around to face him.

"Look, you don't have to go silent on me. I'm not mad at you. It should have never been your responsibility to watch the bags in the first place."

Rupert just stared at him, continuing to remain silent.

The child sighed once more and set his friend to the side. The bear obviously needed a moment to wallow in his guilt. So, Stewie decided not to press the issue any further. The last thing he wanted to deal with on top of this fiasco was some unnecessary drama from his overly emotional bear. God, Rupert could be such a drama queen at times…

The boy just rolled his eyes and shifted himself over on the seat to give Rupert some space. He leaned back, folded his arms, and began tapping out a steady rhythm on the seat with his foot. It didn't take him long to grow incredibly bored, but luckily, just when he was beginning to become annoyed with waiting, the attendant returned with a large phonebook.

The woman walked over to him and began looking around the area, seeming to be confused. After scanning the waiting area, she redirected her attention at the infant sitting alone next to his stuffed bear.

"Where's your caretaker, little guy?"

Stewie just shrugged. He knew that even if he answered this woman's question, it would simply fall on deaf ears. That's how it always was. No one ever understood him.

Finally, after a few moments of silence, the attendant set the book down on the seat next to Stewie, shaking her head as she did so.

"I knew something was up with that dog. What kind of person leaves such a young child all alone in an airport?"

Stewie shrugged once more.

"Apparently, dumb alcoholic dogs, not that I need him to take care of me anyway."

As was expected, the woman paid no mind to his answer. Instead, she simply groaned and tapped her foot impatiently. She began scanning the area once more, obviously looking for Brian, but Stewie knew that he was most likely going to have to drag that sad mutt away from the bar again. He certainly wasn't coming back anytime soon. This woman was wasting her time, and it apparently didn't take her long to realize this, for, after a couple more minutes, she simply groaned again and leaned in to address Stewie.

"I'm sorry, sweetie. I wish I could stay and keep an eye on you, but I have to get back to work. I'll send someone from security to make sure you're ok, though."

At this point, Stewie was just ignoring the woman. As soon as she was gone, he intended to go find the dog so they could figure out what their accommodations would be for the night. He was just ready to get out of this godforsaken airport.

The attendant was in no way fazed by the child's lack of a response. In the next instant, she was turning to leave.

Stewie sighed in relief and turned to his bear.

"Time to go fetch Lassie. I'll be right back, Rupert."

The bear was still unresponsive, but Stewie was far from concerned. Rupert would be fine. He always was, in time.

So, with that, the child hopped down off his seat, and made his way back to the bar that he had already retrieved Brian from not even half an hour ago. Stewie couldn't help but become aware of a strange sense of déjà vu as he entered the establishment and saw the dog sitting on the exact same stool as before. The canine was gulping down a martini. Stewie just groaned.

"Oh, for crying out loud! Haven't you had enough?"

Brian turned to Stewie and shook his head more vigorously than was necessary.

"Th-there's not enou-enough b-booze in the whorld to make dealing with you t-tolerable."

The infant clutched his chest dramatically, feigning hurt.

"Oh! My pride! Whatever shall I do knowing that the filthy house pet is so easily annoyed by me?!"

The boy scoffed at the animal before dropping his theatrics. He didn't have time for this nonsense. In one swift motion, the baby reached over, grabbed the canine's arm, and yanked him off his stool. The dog fell to the floor with a thud, spilling his drink as he landed.

The bartender slammed a glass down that he had been cleaning.

"Hey! Haven't you already made a big enough mess in here!"

Stewie ignored the man as he forced Brian up to his feet and proceeded to pull him out of the bar.

"Hey! I'm talking to you!"

The child just flipped the man the bird and continued to lead the dog back to Gate 8 where Rupert was waiting. The dog was heavy, but luckily, after a few feet, Brian finally started following the child on his own. Once the pair had made it back to the waiting area, Stewie pointed out the phonebook.

"There. Now, find us a place to stay, and let's get the bloody hell out of here. I've had it up to here with this godforsaken airport."

Brian gave no indication that he had heard Stewie as he walked over and retrieved the phonebook before walking over to a payphone that was only a short walking distance away. Stewie grabbed Rupert and followed after the mutt. By the time he had caught up, Brian had the book open to a section that had most of the hotels in the area listed. The dog scanned the page for a bit before making a selection. He reached up to grab the receiver, but suddenly, he stopped. There was a pause, and then, the canine turned around to address his charge.

"Uhhhhh..."

He scratched behind his neck awkwardly before continuing.

"You wouldn't happen to have some spare change on you, would you?"

Stewie reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose as he let out a long groan.

"My word, you really are useless, aren't you?"

The infant then quickly procured some spare quarters from one of the pockets in his overalls. He handed them to the canine, who, Stewie couldn't help but notice, didn't even bother to thank him before immediately turning back around to insert them into the phone.

Brian picked up the receiver and dialed the number he had previously selected.

Stewie just looked on as the dog conducted his business.

"Yes, is this the M-Motel Motel?"

A beat.

"Oh. G-Good. I was just ca-calling to see if you had an-any rooms avwailable."

Stewie shook his head. A disapproving scowl was on his face. This dog was barely getting his words out clearly. It was a wonder that the person on the other end of the line could even understand what was being said. Needless to say, what little faith the child had in Brian's ability to get them home was quickly diminishing.

 _And to think, he's the "smart" one in the family…_

The boy found himself zoning out as he marveled at the family pet's continuous display of incompetence. He was finally brought back to the present, though, when he heard the phone slamming back down on the hook. He jumped a little, but quickly composed himself, placing his hands on his hips and leaning forward as he addressed the canine in a derisive manner.

"So, did you finally do something of use? Hmmmm?"

Brian glared at the little demon child he had foolishly agreed to retrieve from across the country.

"Are y-you _seriously_ going to keep being a l-little bitch about th-this?"

The dog didn't wait for an answer before ripping a page out of the phonebook and slamming it shut.

"C-Come on. I f-found us a hotel on the outsk-outskirts of town. W-We can use the extra change you g-gave me to take a b-bus."

Brian began walking towards the exit of the terminal. Stewie noticed that the dog's stride now appeared a tad...wobbly. The boy looked over at Rupert and sighed.

"Stupid drunk dog. He'll be lucky if he even makes it out of the airport, at this rate."

The child had honestly had more than his fill of Brian's self-destructive behavior by this point, but he knew that the barely-standing dog in front of him was his only ticket home. So, as much as he wished he could just leave the animal to go wander off and die in a gutter somewhere, the boy followed after him with Rupert in tow. He was just ready to put an end to this comedy of errors for the night and wake up to a brand new day where they could, hopefully, move on and figure out how to get back to Quahog.

The two exited the terminal and not two steps later, Brian somehow tripped and fell forward onto the floor. The dog quickly pushed himself back up to his feet, but a few steps later, he tripped again. This time Stewie caught him, though. The boy grunted as he struggled with the dog's weight.

"Oh, for crying out loud! Here!"

The child stabilized the canine and quickly shoved his bear into his overalls before placing the dog's arm over his shoulders for support. Brian fought for only a brief moment before giving in and allowing his young traveling companion to assist him as they made it the rest of the way out of the airport and to the bus stop. All the while, Stewie could feel his blood beginning to boil in anger. This whole situation was absolutely absurd!

 _What am I doing taking care of you?! Shouldn't this be the other way around?!"_

* * *

"S-So, I'll j-just use my...my, uhhhhh...my cr-credit card to get us a r-room for the nnnnight, and then, I'll ca-call L-Lois and get her to s-send us some mon-mon-money."

Stewie sat there in silence with Rupert still tucked away in his overalls for traveling convenience. He was only halfway listening to his drunken escort explain his plan to get them out of this mess. Brian's speech was becoming more and more slurred by the minute, and the child had to keep hitting the dog in order to keep him awake on their bus ride. He would make the mongrel pay for this. He wasn't sure how just yet, but that was ok. Half the fun of revenge was planning out all the special little details.

The sound of snoring made itself known. Stewie turned his head from the window he had been staring out of to see that Brian had dozed off again. Without hesitating, the boy punched the canine in the arm as hard as he could.

"Wake up, damn you! If you miss our stop, so help me, dog!"

Brian's eyes shot open as he jumped up from his seat.

"Wh-Wha? I'm awake! I'm awake!"

The dog looked at the page of the phonebook that was still in his paw, and then turned to a neighboring passenger.

"Hey, uh, excu-excuse me. Have we… Have we passed by…"

The canine hesitated and checked the page again to read from it.

"One One Sveven Seven S-South Palm Cany-Canyon Drive."

He turned back to the passenger.

"Have we passed there yet?"

The person, who looked like neither a man nor a woman, looked at the dog in a manner that made it clear that they were looking at a wreck. Stewie smirked and chuckled to himself, enjoying the warranted humiliation.

Finally, the person looked out their window and offered up an answer to the canine's inquiry.

"Uh, well, we're on South Palm Canyon, now, but I think you might have just missed your stop a couple of blocks back."

Brian's head dropped as he muttered to himself.

"Shhhhhit…"

Stewie wasn't even surprised, by this point, but it still took everything in him to not erupt into an angry tirade. He knew that time was of the essence, though, if he didn't want to walk across town to get to their hotel. So, without any warning, the child jumped up and gave a hard yank on the pull cord hanging above his seat.

The bus came to a sudden halt, sending Brian tumbling to the floor with a thud.

"Oooof!"

Stewie ignored whatever pain he might have caused and hurriedly picked the dog up.

"Come on, then. It looks like we have a bit of a walk ahead of us."

The infant led the canine out of the bus and began walking down the sidewalk.

Brian was barely able to walk now, but Stewie still fought to remain calm. This whole mess was almost over.

The pair walked the next few blocks in complete silence, and by the time they had finally made it to the hotel, Stewie was honestly exhausted. He grunted as he took the last step that brought them right up to the door of the main office.

"Jesus Christ, dog. You weigh a ton!"

The boy stood there for a moment, panting as he caught his breath. Once he had recuperated, he continued.

"Alright. We're here. Now, do you think you can compose yourself long enough to go pay for our room without seeming like a complete fuck up?"

Brian smacked his lips loudly and pulled his arm away from the kid, trying to stand on his own. He swayed a bit, but with Stewie's help he was able to steady himself. He took a breath.

"I-I think so."

Stewie nodded his head.

"Well, alright, then."

The child opened the door and held it for the dog who slowly walked into the building and up to the check-in counter. There was an unkempt, short, chubby man in a baseball cap sitting on the other side.

"Can I help you?"

Brian cleared his throat.

"Uh, y-yes… Yes, you can. I belie-believe I called here j-just a little while ago asking if you had any, uh...any rooms availa-ble."

The man scratched his scraggly chin in thought for a brief moment before responding.

"Ah. That's right. You're the one who was calling from the airport."

Brian shook his head in the affirmative.

"Ye-Yeah. That was me."

The man opened up a book and scanned it with his finger.

"Alright, then. Let's see. Ah! Here we go. I went ahead and reserved you for room thirteen."

He closed the book and met the dog's eyes.

"You have payment?"

In an instant, the canine had materialized a credit card from seemingly out of nowhere. The man took it and swiped it before giving it back.

"Ok. I'll just go get your keys, then."

He walked away for only a second before quickly returning with a set of room keys. He handed them to the dog.

"Here ya go."

Brian snatched the keys a little harder than was necessary, causing them to tear through and become entangled in the page he had forgotten he was holding. He clumsily ripped the keys free before wadding up the paper and attempting to toss it into a nearby waste bin. He missed. The dog stumbled over to the paper ball and deposited it into the trash. He chuckled awkwardly, and then turned to leave the office.

"Th-Thank you. Y-You have a...have a good night, then."

The man said nothing, just stared at the intoxicated mutt as he proceeded out of the office.

Stewie led the way back outside, grabbing the keys from Brian as soon as they were alone once more.

"I'll be taking these. Can't say I trust you not to lose them."

The dog didn't object as the boy proceeded to make his way down the length of the building, looking for room thirteen. It didn't take him long to find it.

"Ah. Here we are."

Stewie reached up and unlocked the door. He pocketed the keys, and then looked over in the direction from which he'd just come to see Brian slowly hobbling his way over.

Face met palm.

 _Seriously…_

The boy ran back over to the struggling canine.

"I don't have time to wait on your slow ass."

The infant draped the dog's arm over his shoulders once more and practically dragged the helpless animal to the door. With some difficulty, he was able to keep the dog from collapsing as he reached up and opened it. The pair stumbled into the room, and Stewie observed with disgust their subpar accomodations for the evening.

"Oh my god!"

The room was filthy. There was an odd stench in the air, and the sound of flies buzzing about was very apparent. It was an absolute offense to the senses, and Stewie would have commented on it more if it were not for the pressing matters at hand. So, doing his best to ignore the state of their room, the child dragged the dog further in and began ordering him around.

"Alright. Let's not dilly-dally."

He let go of the dog and pointed at the room's telephone.

"Get Lois on the phone, have her wire us some money, and let's get the hell out of here."

Brian made like he was about to do just that, muttering some sort of indescribable gibberish as he took his first step. Unfortunately, that was as far as he got. He muttered one last decipherable phrase.

"Uh oh."

And that was it. The canine fell backwards and landed hard on the floor. Stewie knew he was unconscious. The child glared at the passed-out animal on the floor in contempt, posture stern, fists on hips.

 _Great. Just great, dog…_

The filthy creature just layed there, not moving aside from the occasional sign of breath entering in and out of his chest, a complete disaster to behold. As the boy glanced over the mess on the floor, he couldn't help but notice that the spread eagle nature of the dog's form was quite...revealing. Brian's legs were splayed out, calling attention to his genitals which were hanging out in all their unholy glory.

"Oh, that's pretty."

It was a comment forged from the purist sarcasm. The boy pushed the dog's legs together, hoping to make the canine's appearance more appropriate. It didn't work. As soon as he let go, Brian's legs flew apart to their original position, revealing all once more.

The infant flinched away, grimacing at the sight.

"Yeesh!"

He did not want to spend the night staring at that! Thinking quickly, the child rushed over to a nearby lamp and removed the lampshade. He then brought it back and placed it over the area between the dog's legs. It looked a little silly, but it was a much better option than the alternative.

Once Stewie was satisfied with the dog's appearance, he walked over to the bed and hopped up on to it so that he could reach the phone. He wasn't going to wait on that mutt to wake up. Since Brian was once again incapable of handling the situation, he'd just do it himself. He just had to call Lois. With any luck, that vile woman would actually listen to him over the phone…

The boy picked up the phone and spoke into the receiver.

"Hello, operator? Hello-"

Stewie stopped mid-sentence.

"Oh god, that's right. You have to punch in the numbers nowadays."

The infant sighed. Being the old soul that he was, Stewie had never used a modern telephone before. He had to stop and pause for a second to see if he even knew what the number to punch in was. Surely, he had heard it at some point and stored it away in his highly developed memory banks.

"I should know this."

Just then, a very familiar set of numbers popped into his head.

"Oh, yes! 867-5309. That's it."

He entered the numbers as he said them out loud, but just as he had finished dialing the familiar number, it dawned on him just where he had heard that number from.

"No, wait. That's not it…"

The numbers repeated in his head, but now, an accompanying melody played under them.

 _Eight. Six. Seven five. Three O. Ni-yian._

"Damn you, Tommy Tutone!"

Foiled by an earworm. Stewie sighed again, realizing that any hope he had of remembering his home phone number was dashed.

"Only one thing to do."

When all else failed, there was always the process of elimination.

'111-1111."

He dialed the numbers quickly and waited. Someone picked up.

"Lois?"

A man answered. Not Lois.

"Damn!"

Stewie moved on to the next number in the sequence.

"111-1112."

Wait. Pickup.

"Lois?"

Not Lois.

"Damn!"

Next number.

"111-1113."

And on and on it went. The determined child was desperate to reach home, even if this was most likely a hopeless endeavor. It didn't take long for a genius like him to run the numbers in his head. Each number was seven digits, and each digit had ten possible options, meaning the total possible combinations of numbers was 10^7 or 10,000,000. It took him about 3 seconds to check a number.

 _Three times ten-million…_

"111-1119."

 _Divided by sixty…_

"111-1110."

This was going to take a while…

* * *

"Damn!"

Stewie slammed the phone down for the umpteenth and final time that night. He had been at this for hours, and he had finally hit the limit of his patience. He pulled his attention away from the phone and hopped down to the floor. Immediately, he was hit by how tired he was. A loud, long yawn escaped him as he stretched.

"Dear lord. What time is it?"

He shuffled over to the other side of the bed and read the digital clock sitting on the nightstand.

 **11:00**

The child rubbed at his eyes, now regretting having stayed up so late. He yawned again and went to shut the door that he had completely forgotten about in his haste to contact his moronic mother. The door swung and hit Brian in the head. Stewie looked down at the canine. He was still lying there, unconscious and blocking the doorway. The boy shook his head.

 _Even when you're asleep, you can't help but be a nuisance._

If he wasn't so tired, the child probably would have been more annoyed, maybe even angry, but all he could muster up, right now, was a calm acceptance of the situation as he leaned down to push the dog out of the way.

Once he had moved Brian, Stewie shut the door the rest of the way and locked it. Another yawn emitted from him. He was so ready for bed.

The boy walked over to a nearby chair and removed Rupert from his overalls.

The bear was sleeping.

Not wanting to wake his friend, the child gently set Rupert down on the chair. He then proceeded to unbutton his overalls and remove them before folding his clothing and setting them, along with his socks and shoes, aside on another empty chair in the room.

With nothing left to be done, he went to hop back into the bed to sleep for the night. He climbed up onto the mattress, but just as he was about to lay down and rest his weary head, he caught sight of Brian lying there on the floor. It was a sad, pathetic sight, indeed, the canine just lying there sprawled on the floor. Snoring. Shivering.

 _Shivering?_

The boy did a double-take. He hadn't noticed it before, but now, he could see very clearly that the dog was shaking just the tiniest bit. His teeth were chattering ever so slightly, too. The infant felt a chill hit him, and he instinctively rubbed at his arms for warmth.

 _I guess it is kind of chilly in here. Of course, that's not surprising considering I went and left the bloody door open almost all night._

It was at that moment that something incredibly strange happened. A feeling welled up inside little Stewie, a feeling he barely knew but one he definitely recognized.

Sympathy.

 _What the deuce..?_

The boy stopped rubbing at his arms and considered the dog in front of him. Why would he feel sympathy for this animal who had been screwing up at every turn? After all, this whole mess was Brian's fault. Why should he feel sorry for him? Why should it bother him that the dog just might be a little cold as he lay there on the floor? It was preposterous.

The infant groaned and laid himself down, trying to ignore it, but as tired as he was, it didn't take him long to realize that he was having trouble getting to sleep. Rest just wasn't coming to him...not while the occasional sound of the dog's teeth chattering kept reminding him of his traveling companion on the floor.

After several minutes, Stewie sat up again. He glared at the canine.

"You brought this on yourself. If anything, this is a mild punishment."

Of course, Brian said nothing back. It wasn't like Stewie was expecting a response, anyway. He just wanted to go to sleep, but this really was bothering him. As for why, he hadn't the faintest idea. He hated Brian…

Well, maybe hate was a strong word. If anything, Brian was the family member he disliked the least. He was still a moron, but...he wasn't a _complete_ moron. Plus, the dog was the only member in their idiotic family that actually seemed to treat him as an equal, and while Stewie would NEVER admit it outloud, that was something he actually appreciated a great deal.

 _A very great deal._

So, yes, maybe, possibly at some point in the past few months Brian had garnered a tinsy, tiny modicum of respect from the youngest Griffin.

But, enough to warrant this level of care?

It puzzled him. Even with his incredible genius, these feelings actually puzzled him.

Not that he would ever admit that, either.

 _Oh, damn it all!_

Stewie was too tired to think about this any further. The bottom line was, sleep wasn't coming until Brian was off the floor. So, he was going to get the mutt off the damn floor, even if it was much more than the mongrel deserved. Brian should count himself lucky that his charge was so generous.

The infant jumped down to the floor and walked over to Brian.

"Alright, Fido."

He reached down and tried to pull the dog up by the shoulders.

"Up you go."

The young boy pulled with as much strength as he could muster, and after much struggling, he was able to get the canine up into a sitting position.

Brian mumbled something in his sleep. He began falling backwards, but Stewie was quick to catch him.

"Oh, no you don't. Come on. Stand up, you lazy dog."

Stewie kicked the lampshade to the side. He then grabbed Brian under his arms and began lifting him. The dog mumbled again, groggily, and swung his arms around, not content to have his slumber disturbed. It took some doing, but after fighting for awhile, Brian finally stood up. The child hurriedly led him to the bed and ushered him to climb up onto the mattress. The half-asleep canine climbed up and then immediately collapsed onto the mattress. Stewie began panting, bracing himself on the side of the bed as he took a moment to catch his breath after exerting so much effort to get that dumb dog into bed.

Once he had recuperated his strength, he walked around and climbed up onto the other side of the mattress. He had to shift Brian around so that he wasn't taking up most of the bed. It didn't take him much time to get the dog in a normal sleeping position: head on the pillow, no limbs hanging off the sides.

Brian sighed happily in his sleep and smacked his lips loudly. A smile formed on his lips. He appeared much more comfortable than he had been earlier.

Stewie rolled his eyes.

 _I probably won't even get a thank you for this._

The child shook his head and laid his body down next to the dog. He pulled the comforter up to cover them both. The dog moved a bit, snuggling into the fabric before rolling over onto his side, facing away from Stewie. The sound of very light breathing made itself known as the dog settled in for a nice relaxing night's sleep.

Stewie was just happy to have the deed done. Now, he could finally get some rest for himself. First, though, he looked over at the canine sleeping next to him. He still didn't fully understand why he had gone through all the trouble in the first place, and that bothered him. It was a type of confusion that he was completely unused to. So, he just stared at Brian in the dark, pondering his own actions.

 _Why? How?_

A myriad of question rushed through his head, but after awhile, he could feel his eyelids growing heavy. The boy yawned and finally turned to face away from the dog.

"Goodnight, Brian."

He yawned one last time before finally slipping off into sleep.

* * *

It was late into the night, well past midnight, and the occupants of room thirteen were sleeping soundly, both lost in their own dreams and fantasies. All was quiet and peaceful aside from the occasional pesky fly that was buzzing around, but these pests went completely unnoticed by the pair in bed. The stress from earlier in the day had melted away by this point. Stewie was actually smiling in his sleep as he dreamed about finally succeeding in his plans of ending his mother and ruling the planet. Brian was smiling, as well, as he dreamed about...other things. It was this dream that caused the dog to roll over and latch onto Stewie at some point in the night.

Several minutes later, the child was disturbed out of his sleep.

In his mind, Stewie was just about to lower Lois into the most active volcano on Earth when all of a sudden he became aware of a couple of foreign sensations. Something was poking repeatedly against his lower back, and there was an odd squeaking sound coming from completely out of nowhere. Lois's terrified face faded from his vision, and he saw only black as the poking and squeaking remained present.

 _What the deuce..?_

The infant yawned groggily as he slowly realized that he had just been dreaming. He blinked his eyes and rubbed at them, gradually remembering where he was as he woke up. Something was still poking him, and it was beginning to get very irritating. That darn squeaking was going to give him a headache, too, if it persisted. He yawned again and scowled.

"What the devil is going on?"

The boy looked around the room. It didn't take him long to realize that the squeaking was coming from the bed he was sleeping in. For some reason, the frame was moving. He went to get up so he could investigate, but something was holding him down. He looked down and noticed a paw that was holding him in place. It immediately clicked with him whose paw it was.

 _Brian!_

Of course. Who else could it be? He had fallen asleep next to the dog, and now, this annoying mutt had the gall to try and...CUDDLE with him! Did it have to be just one thing after another tonight!?

 _Wait... If Brian's behind me, and something is poking my backside…_

The boy's eyes shot all the way open as he realized just what was happening. Now completely awake, Stewie began to struggle to untangle himself from the animal that was currently thrusting roughly against him. This actually proved to be rather difficult as Brian's grip on him was actually pretty damn tight. He began beating the dog's paw with his fists.

"Let me go, you pathetic horndog!"

Despite shouting as loud as he could, Stewie's cry didn't deter the animal one bit. The child seethed. He knew Brian was out cold. The alcohol had made sure of that. He had little to no hope of waking this filthy creature, but he most certainly was not going to just lie down calmly while he was violated by an animal!

Oh, how he was going to make the dog pay…

It took a lot of effort, but eventually, Stewie managed to rotate his body so that he was facing his capturer. The dog was humping him with reckless abandon now, his movements frantic, causing him to shake the infant in his arms. Stewie placed his hands and feet on the dog's torso and pushed as hard as he could, trying to shove the animal way.

"Let! Me! Go! I'm not some stuffed toy for some drunk, horny mutt to rut against!"

The boy pushed again, hard, pressing his feet into the dog's stomach with the intention of causing pain. It worked. Brian yelped and let go of Stewie. Unfortunately, this caused Stewie to go flying off the bed due to the force of his push. The child screamed and tried to save himself by grabbing onto the comforter, but all he succeeded in doing was bringing the blanket down with him.

The sheet fell on top of him, leaving Stewie lying there dazed and in pitch black darkness. It took awhile for Stewie to get up the energy to move again, and then, even longer to navigate his way out of the messy bundle on the floor. When he finally emerged, he immediately took in a big gulp of air. It had been so stuffy under that blanket as to be suffocating, and while he wasn't in front of a mirror or anything, if he looked the way he felt, then he must be quite disheveled. Of course, who could blame him after what had just occurred?

The boy growled, feeling anger swell in his chest.

 _That damn. Dirty. Dog!_

Stewie punched the ground before finally standing up and making a tiny effort to make himself more presentable for his own dignity's sake. As he was trying to slick his hair back, a sound suddenly caught his ear, a high-pitched but quiet staccato sound. It didn't take Stewie long to realize it was the sound of a dog whimpering, of Brian whimpering in his sleep. It brought a grin to his face. It was practically music to his ears hearing such a pained expression come from the animal that had done nothing but make this whole trip difficult. He didn't care what the whimpering was for, only that it was a representation of something troubling the animal, and surely, that was the purest form of justice, at this point.

Brian deserved to suffer a little, after all.

So, it was with this thought in mind that Stewie giddily climbed back into bed, hoping to revel in the image of his sad, pitiful canine companion crying in his sleep.

"Oh, boo hoo. Did something upset Rover? Ha! Serves you right, do-"

The boy stopped mid-sentence once he finally pulled himself back up onto the mattress and laid his eyes upon the sad, sleeping animal. What he saw was not what he had expected, and even stranger still, the rush of emotions he experienced upon actually seeing the display in the bed was so much more complex than the pure joy he was anticipating.

The boy's mouth fell open, and his heartbeat sped up.

"My...word…"

The visual before him was...shocking to say the least. Though, all things considered, Stewie wasn't sure exactly what he had been expecting anymore. Brian was lying down on his back. Nothing was covering him. The canine's face was screwed up into a pathetic pout as he continued to whimper, and there, standing up straight as a board was his hard, throbbing phallus pointing up towards the ceiling, moisture at the tip and dripping down the side leaving a shiny trail.

Stewie gulped. It was a lot to take in.

For a moment, all he could do was stare as his heart continued to race. The intense anger he had felt only seconds before seemed incredibly distant now as his mind did its best to sort through all the strange things he was beginning to feel in response to witnessing something so forbidden.

It failed.

This whole situation was so...new and strange to him. So, naturally, his curious scientific mind would want to take the time to analyze and learn. This much made sense to him.

He had seen genitalia before, mainly his own of course, and unfortunately, his dunce of a father's on a couple of occasions...

The boy spared himself a moment to shiver at the traumatizing thought before quickly moving on to continue his...analysis.

 _I mean, it's just a penis. All guys have one. It's not THAT interesting._

Brian whimpered again, and the thing between his legs gave a sudden twitch that made Stewie jump in surprise.

 _Ok. Maybe it's a LITTLE interesting…._

After all, it wasn't like he had ever seen such an organ erect before, so unabashedly up and ready for use. Unfortunately for the dog, the thing he intended to use it on was only in his head, leaving his need alone and untended to.

The thing twitched again, and this time the infant proceeded to crawl toward it to investigate further.

Stewie had figured that Brian was whining due to pain. He had pressed his foot pretty hard into the canine's belly, and he had expected to…no, wanted to hurt him. But, now, Stewie could see that there was more than just physical pain causing the dog to cry. He was a genius. He wasn't ignorant. Though, when it came to...this…

Well, it wasn't like he had spent a vast amount of time studying up on matters of sexual reproduction. He had no need for the knowledge. Still, though, he knew the basics. Brian's base instincts were kicking in, and he was in need of a mate. Normally, for most species, this was for the sole purpose of reproduction, but humans occasionally mated solely for the pleasure. And, Brian certainly acted more like a human most of the time…so it made sense to Stewie that Brian would do similarly. So, what was happening now was simply the dog's body responding to sexual stimuli in his mind. How...pathetic.

 _What a silly thing, craving something so fiercely that isn't even there._

The dog whimpered again, and his organ released another drop of liquid that began to drool down the length of meat between his legs. Stewie tilted his head. It really did sound like the animal was in pain. Was he in pain?

 _Does it...hurt to be like that?_

He could remember hearing once that being erect without the proper stimulation could be uncomfortable. But painful? Really? That seemed incredibly inconvenient. Mother Nature was a cruel mistress indeed, if that was the case. Though, there was no way to know for sure, right now, if that WAS the case. It wasn't like he could directly experience what Brian was feeling, at the moment, or anything.

...Maybe he could read up on this more when he returned home.

As for now, the child just continued to look on as the dog continued to whine and pout and writhe and...leak…

 _What...is that?_

Stewie had been observing this strange liquid for some time now, but as he watched drop after drop ooze out of the tip of Brian's penis, it suddenly dawned on him that he honestly had no clue what this strange substance was. It wasn't semen. Brian wasn't achieving orgasm, no matter how much he wanted to, right now. And, it wasn't urine. He could tell that simply because it carried neither the scent or hue of such waste. As far as he knew, though, that's all it could be.

What was he missing here?

Not satisfied to be left in the dark, the boy reached out with his finger to inspect this mystery liquid. He touched one of the drops and traced his way back up the trail it had left, collecting a substantial specimen on his finger. As he did this, he couldn't help but catch a new sound now coming from the dog, a deep, low throaty moan. The child felt his heart stop at the sound. It was unlike anything he'd ever heard, and for a moment, he was unable to move, frozen in place with the tip of his finger resting on the tip of Brian. He gulped.

 _W-Well...he seemed to...enjoy that…_

And, really, Stewie couldn't help but feel that he had enjoyed hearing it. Something about this was absolutely thrilling.

Maybe it was the taboo nature of his current investigation?

The child shook his head, trying to refocus.

 _Right. The liquid. That's what I was examining._

He pulled his finger back and brought a glob of Brian's secretion with it. Immediately, once he had removed his finger, Brian went back to whining. Stewie did his best to ignore this, though, as he gazed at the clear substance coating his finger. It wasn't exactly watery. There was a slight thickness to it, but not much, almost like the consistency of his baby shampoo after Lois added water to the bottle so she could reuse it because his poor, sad family couldn't afford buying more than one bottle every month or so.

He scoffed at the thought and proceeded to rub the liquid between his fingers. It was sort of...slimy, but it wasn't sticky. And, as he continued to rub and feel its texture he found the closest comparison he could make was to spit or something like it. The boy then pulled his fingers apart and watched as the substance held together, stretching into long strands that connected his two fingers. He continued to squeeze and pull the liquid between his fingers for some time, analyzing its behavior curiously as he casually played with it, but it soon became apparent that he had gathered pretty much all the data he possibly could by simply viewing and feeling the mystery substance. The only thing left he could do without some kind of lab equipment was…

 _...taste it._

That rush of excitement hit him again at the vile thought. Taste it!? This...stuff had come out of the dog! Why would he even consider..?

The initial protests died down pretty much as soon as they began as he quickly reminded himself that this was his duty as a man of science.

 _And, I am only doing this purely for the scientific benefit, right?_

That question remained unanswered as he just stared at the substance on his fingers, licking his lips in a nervous manner. He knew what he had to do. It just took him a minute to work up the actual nerve to do it. After a little while, though, that moment finally came.

 _Well, here I go._

Stewie opened his mouth and took in the two fingers he had coated in Brian's discharge. He grimaced, expecting something completely disgusting, but as he sucked and licked his fingers clean, he was surprised to find the substance rather...tasteless. He removed his fingers and held the liquid in his mouth for a moment longer before instinctively swallowing.

The boy's eyes went wide as he did it.

 _W-Why didn't I just spit it out?!_

It was too late, though, the dog's fluid was now resting in the pit of his stomach, and knowing this, Stewie couldn't help but feel...odd. He shuddered.

 _Maybe...I took this too far…_

The child began to reconsider this whole exercise. What was he even gaining from this exploration, anyway? He shook his head and was about to go lay back down so he could go to sleep and forget this whole incident. But, it was just at that moment when Brian let out a rather pathetic sounding howl, and despite trying desperately, Stewie found he was simply unable to ignore it. He redirected his focus on the erect and helpless animal he was sharing the bed with and sighed.

 _How could I possibly have any hope of getting back to sleep with you making all that racket?_

Brian was indeed making quite a bit of noise, and just like earlier when the dog had been chattering his teeth, Stewie was pretty sure that he was going to have to do something himself to silence the animal. The only thing was that, in the prior instance, Brian had simply been cold. The solution had been simple, help the canine into the bed and under the blanket. This time, though...well, there were some very evident solutions, but they weren't quite as simple.

The bottom line was, at the moment, this dog was incredibly horny, and Stewie knew he had two options. Option one was to wake Brian up and make him take care of his own need, whether that be a cold shower or a good wank or whatever it was guys did to relieve their pent up sexual urges. In theory, this option made the most sense, but there was also the factor to consider of Brian being completely and utterly shitfaced. Of course, the dog had probably sobered up a little bit, by now, but considering how far gone he had been before passing out a few hours ago, Stewie knew that mutt had a looooong way to go before he was walking around the hotel room by himself, let alone after just waking up. So, knowing this, it seemed to Stewie that waking up Brian just might be more trouble than it was worth, and he simply did not want to deal with that frustration.

...Which left him with option two…

And, option two was...to relieve Brian...himself…

 _Right… Of course…_

The child let that thought hang in the air for a little while as he sat there and watched Brian groan and fidget on the mattress. He could hear his heartbeat pounding in his ears, and he began to pat his knees in time with the beat as he continued to roll that last thought around in his head.

 _It's not like I really have much choice here…_

It certainly made the most logical sense to him, but that didn't help the matter seem less...intimidating. He hated to admit it, but the thought of actually going through with the act of, well, wanking off his dog was an intimidating one and it gave him pause as he imagined how he would go about the act.

He'd gotten a pretty positive reaction out of Brian earlier when he had traced his finger along his length. Did he just keep doing that until, well...it _happened_? Were there other steps involved? He just didn't know. How...messy would it be at the climax? Would he have to clean that up? There was a lot to consider and no way to really know anything for sure.

And, on top of that, there was also the fact that, even though Stewie knew he would benefit by shutting Brian up, he didn't much care for the idea that he would essentially be rewarding Brian despite of all the shit the mutt had forced him to endure over these last several hours. He didn't want the dog to feel good. He wanted to make him pay! The infant ceased patting his knees and scowled.

 _And, make him pay I shall! This animal shouldn't get to put me through hell and then expect me to service him in such an odious manner!_

He leaned over and crawled closer to Brian as he stared him down.

 _Just who the devil do you think you are? You think you can just act irresponsibly, lose our tickets, and force me to haul your lazy ass around town only for us to end up stranded in a goddamn cheap and filthy motel where you then proceed to violate my person?! And, I'm supposed to repay you for that?!_

Of course, it wasn't like Brian knew what was going on, right now. Stewie was aware of that, but this still felt so very grossly unfair, even if he knew that there was no way Brian would be making him do this if he were conscious. Jesus, the dog would probably be absolutely mortified if he had even the slightest clue…

And, just like that, something clicked into place, and Stewie realized just how brilliant this all really was.

 _Oh, my, but this isn't a form of repayment at all…_

Brian would most certainly be absolutely _mortified_ if he knew what was happening and, frankly, what was about to happen. The dog didn't want this from his young charge, so in all actuality, what Stewie was doing here was just as much a violation as what had occurred earlier when the canine had started sleep-humping him.

It was too perfect.

This wasn't repayment. This was payback.

The child chuckled to himself and moved to take a seat between the dog's legs.

"You really have left yourself in quite the vulnerable position, dog."

Brian groaned again, as if replying to the child's taunt. Stewie laughed again and placed his right hand teasingly on the canine's thigh causing the animal to flinch at the contact. The boy just shook his head and squeezed the fur-covered flesh under his palm.

"Oh, no no no. There's no getting away, now. You brought this on yourself. It's only fair that I get to have my way with you after you forced yourself onto me."

The baby smirked and slowly began moving his hand further up Brian's thigh.

"And, the best part is, I'm the only one who will know. And, I will sit on that knowledge until that perfect moment finally arrives when the act of revealing the truth will be at its most devastating, and believe me, I'll know _exactly_ when that time comes. Until then, it will bring me great joy to know that I will be able to bring your whole world crashing down at any moment with the simple revelation of the time you allowed yourself to get off to the touch of a child."

The boy stopped moving his hand and allowed it to rest just a hairsbreadth away from the dog's groin as he basked in this moment of triumph. The dog was making those high-pitched whining sounds again, obviously aware that the contact he craved was so close but just out of reach. The fact that, due to his unconscious state, Brian was so eager to be touched by the hand resting between his legs, only served to make this whole thing that much more satisfying for Stewie, just another detail to add to his story that would be sure to horrify the family pet.

"It won't even matter that you were unaware when it happened. You won't be able to escape the horrible truth that, in this moment, you so desperately wanted this. I will make sure of it. I will be sure to describe you just as you are now: pathetic, eager, and desperate for _my_ touch."

And, with that final declaration of his intent, Stewie extended out his finger and gently grazed it against one of the canine's exposed testicles. The dog's immediate response was to press his body closer against that finger and howl loudly in an obscene display of pure, primal satisfaction. Stewie watched this and felt his breathing become heavier as that now familiar excitement began to return.

"Whoa, now, boy. Don't get too excited, you stupid mutt. We're only just getting started."

And, as if to prove his point, the boy ceased his gentle touch for a moment and allowed the dog to calm down.

Stewie sat there in silence, listening to the canine's howls slowly lower in volume as he contemplated his next move. It honestly kind of amazed him how easy it was to get such strong reactions out of his dog. He'd only barely touched Brian a couple of times now, but both times had led to some pretty intense responses. It fascinated the boy, to an extent, and he felt like he needed to take those responses into consideration. Because, after all, if that's all it took to get Brian howling with such intensity, how long could Stewie reasonably expect his companion to last once things "picked up steam" so to speak? Sure, the goal here was to essentially just construct an incident to one day shock the dog with later, but...a part of Stewie also didn't want things to end too quickly. This whole thing had turned into a rather satisfying power trip for the infant, and he knew he wanted to savor it. Besides, the longer he could drag this out, the more graphic and horrifying his story would be for later. So, with this in mind, he knew he needed to proceed carefully to avoid bringing Brian over the edge too soon, which was easier said than done considering he was completely new to this whole experience.

 _Ok, let's just take things one step at a time._

Stewie took in a breath and reached over to rest his whole palm over Brian's...coin purse.

The dog once again responded immediately, but this time it wasn't as intense. Instead, the contact simply earned Stewie a low moan from the canine. The child smiled and began rubbing the area slowly.

"That feel good, Brian? You like that?"

The dog smiled and thrusted his pelvis up towards the hand on his body.

Stewie took that as a yes. ...Not that he needed one or anything. Still, there was something encouraging about seeing that smile, and Stewie saw that as a sign to continue on. He began rubbing harder, trying to be careful not to get too rough as he knew that this part of the male anatomy was especially sensitive.

 _I have to be sure not to hurt him again because that just might bring an end to my fu...plan to humiliate this mutt._

Stewie continued rubbing the canine while applying a firm pressure that he thought was just enough to not be too much. Once he was satisfied that Brian was indeed still enjoying himself, he began to transition from simply rubbing at the dog's sack to lightly fondling his testes.

The dog yelped, causing the boy to pause only briefly before he realized that this was actually just another indication that he was doing something VERY right. He felt his heart speeding up again as well as his mouth going dry as he continued on and allowed himself to take in the incredibly lewd sight of Brian responding so positively to his attentions.

"Oh, yes… I don't even have to ask this time. You're loving this, Rover. You're not even trying to hide it you...slut."

A chill shot through Stewie as he used that word that he had once heard on the television. It felt so right.

Feeling emboldened by the dominance he held over the dog, Stewie reached out with his other hand and began running his finger up and down Brian's dick in a similar motion to what he had done earlier when he was collecting his specimen.

The canine began shaking, and high-pitched, pathetic sounding whines began making themselves known in between the almost constant moans that were pouring forth from the dog's muzzle.

Stewie replied with, what he realized was, a rather effeminate giggle, but he paid that no mind. It wasn't like anyone was around to hear him, anyway, and he was enjoying this. Might as well embrace the role.

"Mmmmm. Slutty doggy likes it when little Stewie strokes him."

It was after saying this when Stewie finally took a hold of Brian's wood, and this brought forth a completely new response from the dog. Upon feeling Stewie grab his erection and squeeze ever so slightly, the animal let out a feral growl and began pumping his hips up and down against that grip.

This actually shocked Stewie a bit, causing the baby to jump back. He kept his grip, but he found that, for the moment, he was unable to move as he watched the dog hump his hand with such...determination. It made his excitement grow and his head feel light. It was...intoxicating.

"Oh, my…"

The boy swallowed and moved in closer against the dog.

"I-I think Stewie might like this just as much as slutty doggy…"

The words came out in a whisper, and it almost felt like a confession to himself. He didn't have much time to think about it, though. Brian's humping was increasing in intensity, and Stewie realized that his grip was now slipping due to the also increasing amount of mystery liquid that was leaking out of the canine's tip and beginning to cover the entire surface of the dog's erection..

 _No!_

Determined to keep his hold on the wildly bucking animal, Stewie grabbed on to the length with his other hand. This made holding on to Brian much easier, but he was starting to feel slightly overwhelmed. It took him awhile to come back to his senses and refocus on the task at hand.

 _I guess there's not much more escalation that can occur. Time to finish the job._

There was nothing left to do but to now stroke Brian with everything he had.

So, that's what Stewie proceeded to do.

The child began moving his hands up and down the pole between Brian's legs, using the canine's secretion as a sort of lubricant that allowed him to achieve a smooth glide along the shaft. Brian growled again, and Stewie began breathing heavily as he spoke, egging his dog on towards the finish.

"That's right, dog. Let those wonderful feelings overwhelm you. Embrace completion."

The canine shuddered and began howling louder than he had all that night. Stewie smirked and started to move his hands faster, trying to match the pace of the canine's thrusts so that their movements would better sync up.

"Oh, god. You are just so desperate. I really am doing you quite the favor, aren't I. And to think…"

Stewie began moving his hands in a twisting motion and squeezing as he made his way up and down Brian's dick over and over, trying to mix things up so the dog never became too accustomed to the same sensations.

"...I won't even get a thank you."

Brian was now writhing around frantically on the bed, paws digging into the sheets as random noises emitted from him with no discernable pattern. Stewie was pretty sure that things were about to reach their inevitable end. He was so hyper-focused on his task. His goal was just within reach.

 _Come on! Get it over with!_

But, then, all of a sudden, the loud, deep voice of a male broke through and disrupted his concentration.

"You got the stuff?"

Stewie looked around in slight confusion at the sudden new sound.

 _What the deuce?_

"Yeah. I got it. Where's the money, huh?"

Another male voice, different from the one before.

"I wanna see the money!"

Stewie listened in carefully and quickly discovered that the new voices he was hearing were coming from the next room over.

"Oh, no no. You don't see the money until I see the stuff."

Stewie groaned. These imbeciles were ruining his moment, and he simply couldn't let them get away with that. Knowing just how to put an end to this nuisance as quickly as possible, the child shouted out so he could be heard clearly.

"HE'S WEARING A WIRE!"

Immediately, the tone of one of the men turned to anger, and then, gunshots rang out as several bullets came flying through the wall just above the headboard of the bed Brian and Stewie were sharing. Stewie was hardly fazed by this, but the same could not be said for Brian who ended up being startled by all the sudden loud noises. Stewie's method had indeed brought silence to the next room over, but the price for that silence had been alerting Brian. Now, the dog had ceased his thrusting, and his moans had transformed into groggy sounding groans.

Stewie noticed this, and while he did feel his stomach drop at the realization that Brian was about to discover what was going on, he found that he could not bring himself to stop moving his hands. He couldn't stop now, not after coming this far, not after getting this close. He had committed to this task and he was no quitter. So, he sped up his hands and moved to straddle the dog's legs, hoping to impede the canine's movement so he could not escape once he realized what was happening.

The boy watched nervously as Brian started to slowly awake from his deep slumber, first blinking his eyes ever so slightly before reaching up to rub at them. The dog smacked his lips loudly and grunted.

"Wha-What the hell was th-that?"

Stewie didn't answer. He just continued to watch Brian intensely as the canine gradually became more and more aware of his current predicament.

"Ohhhh."

The dog moaned lustfully and his hips started moving again as he began responding to the sensations below his waist once more.

"Mmmmm. What the… Wh-What's going on?"

He shook his head and finally opened his eyes fully. His attention immediately went to the child sitting on his legs.

"St-Stewie?"

Stewie wasn't sure if all the stuttering was due to Brian obviously still being drunk or just a natural response to the pleasant sensations he was experiencing. Either way, Stewie said nothing. His only response was a firm squeeze, hoping to quickly coax his pet to his unavoidable release.

Brian gasped and began bucking his hips wildly, still not fully comprehending what was happening to him.

"Oh, god. That feels so good…"

The dog began panting. This caused Stewie to smile proudly as he felt himself sinking back into that incredibly gratifying feeling of power he had been indulging in for the past several minutes. He chuckled at the foolish animal and spoke authoritatively.

"Well, it doesn't take a genius to see just how much you've been enjoying this."

Brian's judgement was so clouded that, initially, he only shook his head in agreement with the child's words, continuing to move his hips in time with Stewie's strokes for a good while longer before finally seeming to have a moment of clarity. His eyes opened fully, and he frowned.

"W-Wait a… Wait a mi-minute…"

His thrusts started to slow down, but Stewie kept up his rigorous pace. He could hear in between the words that his dog's breaths were starting to come in quick, short bursts. It wouldn't be long now. Just a little more.

Another squeeze at the base before sliding rapidly back up the length.

Brian grunted and struggled to lift himself up on his elbows.

"Wh-What are… What are y-you doing, k-kid?"

Stewie chuckled and leaned forward so he could stare straight into the eyes of his confused captive who was slowly becoming more and more aware of the situation currently at hand.

"I'm giving this slutty mutt what he deserves."

He said it as matter-of-factly as he could, and in that moment, Brian finally seemed to see the big picture.

It was too late, though.

In the next instant, Stewie felt the canine's body go completely rigid as he shouted out.

"Oh, shit! Shit!"

The phallus in the child's hand began to vibrate, and several spurts of semen erupted from the moist tip, flying up into the air and landing on both the dog and infant. Stewie flinched away and finally let go of Brian's dick once he felt some of Brian's sperm land on his hands and the front of his shirt. Brian just continued to shout obscenity after obscenity, obviously trying to come to grips with what had just happened to him while still riding an intense wave of vile, beautiful pleasure.

"Fuck! This can't be- This can't be happening! Ahhhh!"

Stewie felt his jaw drop as he watched on in pure awe while Brian convulsed on the mattress, continuing to shoot his...essence into the air. There was so much. He didn't understand how there could be this much.

 _Shit. I"m going to have to clean that up, too…_

It wasn't exactly something the child was looking forward to, but he couldn't find it in him to worry about that too much when he was so busy taking in the sight of Brian experiencing, what must have been, a VERY strong orgasm. It was nothing at all like Stewie had imagined. He didn't expect it go on for so long or for the dog to quiver and shake so violently. It was...stunning.

But, at last, the first signs that Brian's climax was coming to an end began to show. His penis stopped firing away like a semi-automatic weapon and instead began drizzling out what little it had left to release. Brian's body was beginning to stop shaking, too, and while the dog was still cursing up a storm, Stewie could tell that he no longer had the strength to scream as loudly as he had been. Instead, his words were only coming out in barely audible whispers, a clear indication that what he had just experienced had sapped him of almost all his strength.

"Fuuuuuck. No. This is... Th-This is some kind of nightmare… Shit…"

The dog whimpered as his form finally stopped moving and came to lie completely motionless, aside from the hardly-noticeable indication that he was still breathing.

Stewie watched as it all came to an end. A stillness took hold of the room, and the child took in a deep breath as whatever trance he had been in for the last several minutes finally released him from its clutches. The air grew tense, and the boy waited to see what his companion would do next.

He didn't have to wait for long.

With what little strength the dog had left, he managed to lift his head and look at the baby who was still sitting on his legs. He gulped and whispered out between heavy breaths,

"You're a… You're a freakin'...psychopath."

Stewie would have responded, but immediately after uttering those words, Brian's head fell back and hit the pillow. His eyes shut, and the next sounds that could be heard coming from the canine were the sounds of heavy snoring.

Stewie just continued to sit there, blinking with an impassive expression and contemplating the ramifications for what he had just done. Only he wasn't really all that concerned about what Brian would say and do in the morning. He was confident in his ability to handle that.

No, for now, there were much more important things to worry about. The boy sighed and grimaced as he looked down at the strip of semen still resting on his shirt.

 _I really hope this stuff doesn't stain..._

* * *

Morning arrived, and it arrived fairly normally. The sun rose, bringing in a few rays of natural, warm light into the dingy hotel room, illuminating the dog and baby pair who were sleeping soundly on the messy bed. The comforter was still on the floor, and the remaining sheet was all bunched up at the foot of the mattress, a clear indication of there having been some kind of activity in the night. Stewie was lying on his side, in just his diaper, wearing an expression of the purest contentment. Brian, however, was flat on his back, frowning and occasionally fidgeting in his sleep as if he was experiencing some kind of nightmare. Still, it was clear neither of them was going to awaken anytime soon.

But, then, the phone rang.

It was Stewie who noticed this first. His eyes fluttered open, and the smile on his face quickly turned into a scowl.

 _Oh, god… What's that horrible noise?_

He rolled over, trying to ignore the obnoxiously loud ringing. It was too early for this. He wasn't sure when he had finally gotten back to sleep last night, but it had to have been rather late. It had taken him awhile to clean up Brian's mess, especially when it came to getting that gunk out of the canine's fur. It ended up being _such_ a tiring endeavour, and the child just was not ready to let sleep relinquish its hold on him.

Unfortunately, the phone just continued to ring, slowly wearing down Stewie's resolve until he finally caved and rolled back over.

"Oh, damn it all!"

He sat up and rubbed at his eyes before finally crawling over and answering the phone, making sure to speak in a manner that made his irritation with the idiot on the other end very clear.

"What?!"

The voice that responded was that of the man who had been at the hotel's check-in desk the previous night.

"Hey, asshole, what gives? That credit card you gave me was declined."

Stewie's eyebrow quirked in confusion.

"What do you mean our credit card was declined?"

The man completely bypassed the infant's question.

"I don't take too kindly to people trying to scam me. I'm coming up to your room, and you better have my payment!"

Stewie's eyes shot open as the severity of the situation finally dawned on him.

"Oh, no! No no n-no no! There's no need to come up! W-We'll… Uh..."

Stewie didn't get a chance to diffuse the situation, though. Before he could finish his sentence, the man had hung up. The child heard the line go dead and his heart began to race.

"Blast!"

The boy dropped the phone, not even bothering to hang it up as he rushed over to retrieve his clothes. That man was on his way, and Stewie didn't have much time. He and Brian had to get out of here. Fast.

The infant ran into the bathroom and grabbed his shirt off the rack where he had hung it to dry after cleaning it last night. It was still a little damp, but despite this, Stewie hurriedly slipped it on anyway, grimacing as the wet fabric touched his skin.

"Ugh!"

He shivered at the cold, unpleasant sensation before rushing back into the main room where the rest of his clothes were. He grabbed his overalls and started to put them on. He was in such a rush, though, that his leg ended up getting stuck, causing him to lose his balance and fall forward. The child hit floor and groaned.

"Dammit!"

He rolled over and made quick work of pulling his legs through the appropriate holes before standing once more and pulling his overalls all the way up his torso. He then slipped his arms through the straps, and slid on his footwear before running back over to the bed. He climbed up and grabbed his dog by the collar, trying desperately to wake up the canine.

"Come on, you! Wake up!"

He pulled on the collar, but Brian just hung there limply. The mutt was out cold.

 _Is it possible for you to stop being a nuisance for ONE SECOND!_

The infant let go of the animal, who landed back on the mattress with a hard thud. Stewie shook his head. How was he going to do this?

"Go for a ride in the car?"

That usually worked to get the dog's attention, but the bitch wasn't biting this time. Stewie sighed and climbed on top of the canine's chest.

"Jesus Christ, dog, wake up!"

The boy began slapping Brian repeatedly, hoping to beat him back into consciousness. The dog just laid there and took it. He didn't even flinch.

"Ahhhh!"

The child jumped off the dog and hopped down to the floor.

"Fine. I'll pull you off the bed myself!"

Stewie began tugging at a sheet that Brian was lying on top of, figuring he just might be able to pull hard enough to yank Brian off the mattress. He assumed wrong. It quickly became clear that such a feat required more strength than he was capable of mustering. He pulled with all his might, leaning back so that his whole body weight was behind his efforts, but he just ended up sliding down the floor until he was lying on his back.

"Blast!"

Stewie's anger was rising. He wasted no time before hopping up off the floor and back onto the bed.

"Alright. So, that's how it's going to be?"

He grabbed the dog by the collar again and began tugging him towards the edge of the mattress.

"I"m going to wake you up one way or another, dog!"

Stewie yanked the animal towards him, and to his great joy, the dog actually moved a little bit.

 _Ah. There we are._

He pulled again, and Brian followed. It didn't take him long to get the dog at the edge of the bed, and then, all it took was a little shove to get the mutt to fall down to the carpeted but still hard floor. Stewie heard the canine groan upon hitting the ground. He smiled. Surely that had woken Brian up. He peered over the edge of the bed, and his smile immediately fell.

It had not.

"Oh, for the love of…"

The boy jumped down on top of the dog. The canine groaned again, but still remained stuck in dreamland. Stewie grabbed the dog by the shoulders and began shaking him violently.

"Wake up, you stupid mutt!"

Brian didn't respond.

The child began searching the room for something he could use. That man would be here any minute now. He had to think quickly.

 _Come on, Stewart, think!_

His gaze finally landed on the doorway leading to the bathroom.

 _Aha!_

With new-found resolve, the baby grabbed Brian's collar once more and began pulling him towards the bathroom. The dog actually slid across the carpet fairly easily, so it didn't take the infant long to drag him all the way into the bathroom and up to the tub. It did take a little more effort to actually lift the mutt into the tub, but the infant was still able to just barely lift the animal's body up and over the edge. The child breathed a sigh of relief once he had the dog all the way into the tub.

 _I swear to god, if this doesn't work…_

Stewie turned on the water so that the showerhead began pouring down cold water on his canine companion. He then gave the animal a hard slap with the back of his hand.

"Wake up!"

That did it.

Brian began squirming, and then, his eyes flew open.

Success.

The dog began scanning his surroundings frantically as he tried to make sense of the current situation after having been awoken so suddenly.

"Wha-Wha-What? Ugh!"

He reached up and placed his palm on his temple.

"My head…"

He sat up and finally noticed Stewie standing at the edge of the tub, a stern expression on his face.

"Oh, god. What are we doing here?"

Stewie tilted his head, considering the canine's question. Did he really not remember anything?

 _My, how annoying…_

The infant folded his arms and was about to begin explaining their predicament, but just as he was about to start speaking, he noticed the dog's eyes go wide in shock as if some sort of revelation had just hit him like a ton of bricks.

"Oh. My. God."

The dog jumped out of the tub. His breathing grew heavy and frantic as he reached up to grip the hair on the top of his head tightly. Stewie thought he looked truly mad and deranged.

"Oh! My! God!"

The child sighed. They didn't have time for this silliness.

"Are you done? Because we kind of have to get the hell out of here. Your credit card was declined, which shouldn't surprise me considering how absolutely useless you've been this whole trip, but the real issue is the fact that the man at the check-in desk is now on his way to force proper payment out of us. So, uh, yeah, we should scram."

Brian looked down at the tyke in front of him and laughed like an insane person.

"Wha-What?! What the hell are you talking about?!"

He let go of his head and balled his paws into tight fists.

"You got me off last night!"

The infant scoffed at this and rolled his eyes.

"Oh, is that what you're freaking out about? Well, don't, because it's no big deal. I simply did what I had to do to shut you up so I could get some much-needed rest. Jesus, you should have heard the noise you were making with your constant moaning and whimpering. It was driving me up a fucking wall! So, yes, I got you off last night, dog. Deal with it. As for right now, as I just finished explaining to you, we have to get the hell out of here!"

Brian seethed and took a step towards the little demon spawn but ceased his approach once he heard a knock on the motel room door. Stewie turned to look at the door.

"Oh, crap."

The voice of the man began calling from the other side.

"Hotel manager! Open up or I'll hit you with this blunt instrument I use to hit deadbeats with bad credit cards."

Stewie turned back to look at the dog with an expression that said "I told you so".

Brian dropped his fists and seemed to, reluctantly, get the message.

The man continued to call out.

Well, it's not an instrument. It's more of an object, but it's blunt. Hard and blunt. And, well… It's kind of like a bat. I found it out back one day when I was raking."

Stewie motioned toward a window that was just above the tub.

"Let's go!"

Brian nodded his head and moved towards the window. Stewie did the same but stopped when he remembered something.

"Oh! That's right!"

He quickly ran back into the main room, grabbed Rupert, and stuffed him into his overalls.

"I could never forget you, Rupert."

He ran back into the bathroom to find Brian already opening the window. The dog looked over at Stewie and waved him over.

"Come on. I'll give you a boost."

Stewie nodded his head and allowed the canine to lift him up to where he was able to grab onto the windowsill and climb his way up and out of the room. Brian was quick to follow. Once the two of them were outside they ran over to the parking lot located in the back of the motel. Stewie led the way.

"Alright. We need some wheels."

Brian ran past him and up to a brown SUV. He pulled on the passenger's side door handle. The door opened.

"This one's unlocked!"

Stewie looked at the vehicle and grimaced. He knew they were in a hurry here, but...surely they could do better than that.

"An SUV?"

He sighed.

"Look, we're trying to elude someone. We're not driving to soccer practice."

He looked over at the much nicer looking car next to them and pointed at it.

"Let's take this one."

Brian growled and tugged on the infant's arm.

"Just get in the damn car!"

Stewie yanked his arm free and rubbed the now sore area where the dog had grabbed him.

"Ouch! ...Bitch..."

Brian said nothing more as he climbed into the vehicle. Stewie knew he had no other choice but to join the intolerable mutt. He hopped into the passenger seat and slammed the door shut. Brian took his place in the driver's seat, and then...just sat there. Stewie looked at the animal, wondering what the holdup was.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Hotwire the damn thing!"

Brian just blinked at him.

"Hotwire it? I don't know how to do that! I figured you did!"

Stewie groaned. Of course. Once again, it was up to him to do everything. The pattern remained consistent. The boy sighed and gaze a defeated shrug before hopping down to the floor and crawling over to the place under the steering wheel, right in between Brian's legs. He didn't have to look at the dog to feel the tension coming off his body. The child chuckled and made quick work of his task.

 _Funny how I keep ending up here…_

Stewie found the wires he needed and touched them together. The SUV's engine roared to life, and the infant climbed back into the seat.

"There. Now, go, dog!"

Brian didn't need to be told twice. Just as the manager was catching up to their getaway car, the dog put the vehicle in drive and sped off down the road. Stewie leaned back in his seat and breathed a sigh of relief. He looked over at the animal and smirked.

"Well. Hehe. That sure was a close one. Hmmm?"

The dog didn't say anything, didn't even look at the baby sitting next to him. He just kept staring at the road, concentrating on his driving.

Stewie tilted his head. He was pretty sure he knew why Brian was choosing to ignore him.

"Oh, come on, dog, don't be like that."

The canine flinched, and it seemed like he was trying to bite his tongue, not wanting to engage. Stewie didn't like it.

"You can't keep silent during this whole trip. You know that. You might as well say whatever it is you want to say right now."

This time the dog uttered a sad-sounding laugh before finally addressing the boy.

"Are you fucking serious?"

Stewie folded his arms and stared daggers at the canine.

"When am I ever _not_ serious?"

The dog laughed again, this time actually sparing Stewie a glance before turning back to face the road.

"I-I don't know what I want say. Ok?"

There was a beat, and then, he continued.

"You seriously did that...to me? I didn't dream it? It wasn't some kind of sick, twisted nightmare? Because I'd much prefer that was the case! Even if that, too, would have its own disturbing implications…"

The canine's voice trailed off there at the end as if he was speaking more to himself than to Stewie.

The boy unfolded his arms and watched the expression on the dog's face carefully. It was clear that Brian was trying to put up a tough front, but the sadness and confusion was still very apparent. And, as Stewie considered Brian's questions he began to actually wonder what his answer should be. If he told Brian that he had just been messing with him earlier, would that really alleviate whatever distress the dog was currently dealing with? Most importantly of all, though...why did he even care? Why would he even consider giving Brian an out here? Wasn't almost the whole point of what he had done last night to cause such distress? The child was puzzled. He didn't know what to say.

"I…"

He hesitated.

The dog looked at him, begging for an answer with his eyes.

Stewie shut his, finding he was unable to look. This conversation was making him very uncomfortable. It wasn't supposed to be like this!

 _Why can't things ever be easy with you, dog!_

The child huffed in anger and then opened his eyes again.

"It was no dream, Brian. You saw what happened. I told you what happened. It's done. I woke up to you humping me in your sleep. Luckily, I was able to escape your vile clutches, but then, you just kept _whining_!"

The infant threw his arms into the air, causing Brian to flinch away slightly. It was a good sign to Stewie that he was regaining control of this situation.

"I had to do something! You wouldn't shut the fuck up! So, yes, I jacked you off! But, don't worry too much. It meant nothing. I simply did what I had to do, what you _forced_ me to do. So, how about you focus on that for minute. Hmmm?!"

The animal's eyes went wide, and he opened his mouth as if to say something before simply shaking his head and turning to face the road again.

"I… I don't want to talk about this anymore. You win, kid…"

That last sentence came out in a barely audible whisper, but Stewie's keen ears picked it up with ease. The infant grinned and turned to face front as well, arms coming to rest back in their previously folded position.

"Good. I must admit that I've grown quite tired of this subject, as well."

And, with that, silence fell, and no more words were exchanged with the pair during the whole rest of the ride.

However, despite wanting desperately to move on from the incident, Stewie found that his mind couldn't be kept from continuously wandering back to what all had occurred last night. He ran the events over and over again in his head. He'd thought he had known what he was doing, at the time, but now...he just wasn't so sure. It was around the time they had finally crossed the state line that Stewie felt a strange sensation below his waist.

 _What the deuce?_

He looked over to make sure Brian wasn't paying attention to him before reaching down to feel between his legs.

...The area there was stiffer than it had ever been.

He gulped.

 _Now THAT...is interesting..._


End file.
